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Current Music:James Keelaghan - Sea for the Shore
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Subject:The Splinter
Time:03:04 pm
Current Mood:sicksick
Title: The Splinter
Rating: PG
Word count: 100
Pairings or characters involved: Stephen/Jack
Character(s) to give rum to: Mr. Pullings
Author and notes: An answer to Challenge #8. Movieverse, based on that odd little pause in their discussion after the battle. Stephen's POV.


It was such a little thing, not half the length of a finger, but blood covered it.

It was hardly the first of his blood I had seen. Of all his injuries, this was perhaps the least, certainly less than others I had treated today. But I could not help but think of chance. What if it had been a little larger, or struck a little harder. I could not help imagining his face replacing those whose eyes I’d closed.

I offered it to him, wondering what would have become of me then.

He took it, eyes reflecting my question.
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linaerys
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-24 03:19 pm (UTC)
Hmm, I really liked this, although for some reason it took me a couple of readings to understand it.

Hope you feel better.

I, too, am feeling ill, hence the challenge.
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muccamukk
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-24 03:25 pm (UTC)
Thank you, perhaps it only makes sense to my plauge ridden mind.

I hate flu season. Though it does provide insparation for illness fics. I hope you fell better too.

I think I'll go have a nap now.
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sparowe
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Time:2004-02-24 04:09 pm (UTC)
The eternal "what if" that must be present between them. I like it.

Feel better soon, dear.

Anon
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(Deleted comment)

cruisedirector
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-24 05:01 pm (UTC)
Lovely!
(Reply) (Thread)

bronzelionel
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Time:2004-02-24 08:14 pm (UTC)
Loved this- such a well-phrased reconstruction of that scene. Aye, bravo. :D
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dylant
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-24 08:48 pm (UTC)
Beautifully written. This is one of my favorite drabbles of, like, a long time. It harnesses exactly what is so great about shorts like this -- giving us that much, but not, somehow, *quite* enough. Like "...wondering what would have become of me then." In itself, it's not that emotional of a question, but oh, coming from Stephen in regards to Jack, we can read that it is.

and I love how Stephen "could not help" but imagine Jack dead, as if he even tried to stop himself from imagining it but knows he can't.
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muccamukk
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-24 09:10 pm (UTC)
Hey, your post is only five words short of a dribble. That's got to be the longest review I've ever received. Thank you!

For me, the art of dribbling (which I just discovered a week ago, and am therefore no expert on) is that of creating lines for people to read between. I'm not entirely successful yet. I'm only really happy with this one and, to a lesser extent, Unrequited. I'm going to need a hell of a lot more practice to reach cruisedirector's level of expertise (if I ever do).

But my longer fiction is written along those lines as well. I admire overt angst, but I can't really write it.
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ghazalah
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-25 09:55 am (UTC)
Mmm, that's a nice moment you've filled out. I love that tiny thing in the movie: removes the splinter, gives Jack a Look. :-)

I can't tell (in the movie) how he knows there's a splinter, but I enjoy his search!
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muccamukk
Link:(Link)
Time:2004-02-25 01:53 pm (UTC)
Stephen was looking at the cut on Jack's forhead, and from that angle, he could see down Jack's collar (I certainly would have snuck a peek).
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giglet
Link:(Link)
Time:2007-03-07 02:53 pm (UTC)
Oh, yay! I just discovered this from your "Favorite Five" post. It's a lovely moment, handled very nicely!
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muccamukk
Link:(Link)
Time:2007-03-07 05:08 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I used to write piles of these things, but I haven't in a while. I kind of miss it.
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